I am Scared But I am Living!

I am Scared But I am Living! - elsieisy blog

Its the first day in the month of August and I am at a place where nothing is certain. I am scared! Yes, scared! Scared because I am just human. I know not what the future holds. I am hopeful. Holding on to my hope and merely hoping it’s also not a mirage.

July turned out to be not such a pleasant month. Not because money was not made, not because I am not proud of myself, this blog and my Elsians. Looking at it as I type this, July was actually beautiful. I guess you are wondering why I am then saying it’s not pleasant. I will explain.

July for me was a month of decision. A month to take the first step and see how it goes. The month which preceded the full entrepreneurial month. A month leading to the month I am all vulnerable and fierce. Taking decisions and standing by them is never easy no matter how strong you think you are.

There is this part of people we will probably not get to see unless they let you. It’s tough being me – Elsie Godwin. It’s probably tough being you too. But we are alive. I am alive. I live and that’s all that matters for the now. It means I have the opportunity to keep writing my story. I am the author and I have that one right authors have to their works – the right to shuffle and reshuffle. I have the right to make me the hero of this book. Regret has no place in my character. This character must come out victorious. No option!

At the beginning of this year 2016, we all had plans. Our hopes were high. There were things we expected to be in place before the end of 1st quarter. But this is August, the 8th month in 2016 and it probably feels like we are still struggling to get there. Some of us have lost hope. Some have resolved to waiting for another year – 2017. What will that do for you? Lead you to another year of disappointment?

No matter how slow it seems, how bad the view is from your end, you are not the same person you were this time last year. You are better, wiser, stronger and closer to your dream. Do not let any day waste. Appreciate every minute, appreciate every opportunity, appreciate where you are now, appreciate every smile because now will never return. It is gone and gone for life. Do the things you should now and leave room for no regret. Make decisions and be ready to take them by the horn.

As much as I have been enveloped by fear…I tell you these past days leading to this month of August have been beautiful. I have done things that relaxes me and will keep doing them. I am learning, reading, watching movies, crying, laughing and feeling (Traveling to a state or country I have never been is one thing I should do soon). I am alive and laying my nets down to catch the fish. When that fish comes, that need of yours, when you get to that place you want to be, you get to face new challenges, new hope, new hurdles. The things you refuse to do now, you will never be able to do.

Do not look like an old wo/man doing what he should have done in his 20s. So yes I am sacred, but I am living, I am happy, I am having fun, working hard and moving closer to where I want to be with pride.

Do same…you won’t regret it.

Happy new month darlings!

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  1. This is beautiful….actually it’s hopeful…for those of us that the future seems blurry….those of us scared to wakeup in the morning and afraid to sleep at night…we all are fighting different battles…thanks for these encouraging words.

  2. Yeah, same here. I am scared but still alive. Unlike you I keep postponing making a To-do list of goals, I’ll bully myself into it soon. Thanks for the reminders auntie Elsie.

  3. Happy New Month. This month is tagged the month of NEW BEGINNING. I want to assure you that anything that seems death or stagnant in your life will come back to life. Note that the seventh month was tagged the month of DIVINE PERFECTION cos seven signifies perfection. Hence, when God perfects all that concerns you, they will be given a NEW BEGINNING. Rejoice like never before this month watching the Almighty God give everything around you a new life. Have a fruitful and rewarding month.

  4. I’m kind of dealing with depression… So coming across this from YOU eased away some of the pain… Funny thing is this is the first time I’m actually opening a link to this blog and I’ve read a couple of interesting articles… I love it all.. Even more so this… Thanks for being a glimmer of light in a dark chaotic mind!!! Already “subbed” yayMe

  5. This is so encouraging, some of us still don’t ve the courage to express our fears or stand fierce by the things we want but this is comforting n it certainly can lift up someone who’s really down n make anyone see a bright side to life. I AM SCARED TOO. Well done Elsieisy

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