How to be a caring lover

Been a while I gave you a bit of my relationship meal. I am so sorry…my schedule has been crazy. You know how it gets when you have an idea screaming in your head…well yea, that’s how I have been feeling for a while now and I finally have the courage to give it a big push. It’s going to be a really huge step for me, my boss madam (toperants) hasn’t forsaken me on this journey, going to be working with an awesome team and proper announcement will be made very soon…I hope I can keep this secret long enough… 😀

Back to the matter…

When you ask any lady to give you a list of what is to be expected of her dream man, you will find the word ‘caring’ somewhere at the top, middle, or bottom of the prioritized section on the list.

We all love to be cared for, we love to be pampered, we love to be admired…the list goes on

However, how much do you care for your partner?

When I started typing, I must confess, all I had in mind was to teach men how to care for their women asides asking the silly question ‘have you eaten?’ but am letting my head lead me.

IMG_20150711_230036It’s just fair to care for your partner just as much as s/he cares for you. A relationship cannot be sweet when it is one sided.

Dear ladies, it’s easy for us to demand our man being there for us – financially, emotionally, physically, mentally, everytally available…no wahala, but tell me, which is of the tally do you plan to beat him to in the game

A man needs to be loved

A man needs to be cared for

A man needs to be pampered

He needs you to also be there for him financially, emotionally, mentally and every way possible. He is human and needs to be understood. Its time ladies stop playing the victim in every relationship. Yes yes men can be evil and seems really difficult to satisfy but we ladies sef, we get our own for body.

Because he’s a man doesn’t mean he should die for you. Jesus did that already please. And if nobody died for you yet because of your religion then convert to being a Christian. All I am saying is don’t expect him to die for you before realizing how much he cares for you.

You ask me how to care for a man? I will share few tips on how you can be a caring lover


Your man needs you to understand him. Remember how you tell your friend while trying to make your face like omosexy ‘I need a man who would understand me’, oh yes! Your man is a human being and needs you to understand him too. Don’t always be judgmental; don’t let generalization cloud your sense of reasoning. He is your man, not all men.

Sometimes, he wants your opinion, other times he wants you to just listen, hug him and tell him all will be well.

Spoil him too

And I don’t mean buying him handkerchief and boxers. You probably don’t earn as much as he does (and if you do, spend it biko), however, it won’t hurt to plan towards getting your man a very nice gift. It doesn’t have to be overly expensive, but it has to be packaged well and enough to get his guy friends jealous (yes they get jealous) and to keep your competitors on their toes…lol

Your man’s physical appearance must matter to you. When I see an unkept looking man, the first thing to cross my mind has and will always be ‘was his wife blind’… I am sorry but can’t help it. Make conscious efforts to help your man look awesome. You don’t necessarily need to turn to dry-cleaner sha…


See ehn, the truth is, this financial matter is a very VOLATILE matter but must be delved into. It’s not wrong to assist your man financially when necessary, it’s not wrong to give him financial advice when necessary. It is not even wrong to lend him money. You both are in this to love, care and adore each other. Ladies will fondly say, ‘his money is ours and my money is mine’ but who is deceiving who? Transparency and sincerity with the right partner will help better planning towards the future.


As much as abstinence is the new cool, if sex is still part of your relationship, which is another cool for me too, then do lil extras to tickle his fancy. Don’t just lie there waiting for him to perform the magic. Perform magic too and make him wow.

Have more idea on how to pamper our men? Please do share using the comment box or send me a mail as usual. My various social media accounts still remain the same.

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  1. If you want to know more on this then subscribe to Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages. Just goggle him, y’all would be amazed

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