No one rule fits all

no one rule fits all

The thing about relationships and the way we see them have a lot to do with the way we relate in our day to day living as well. A friend once asked me if anyone reads my relationship posts and she was shocked when I told her relationship articles are the most read on my blog just after the xrated article. (Of course you know porn sells).

Humans are always in search of answers especially when it affects them directly. The number of people going through emotional headache can’t be quantified just because we all tend to cover it up and live under the pretense of ‘my relationship is the best’ thereby dying inside and soaking our pillows with tears – there goes something else I detest; pretense.

It would help us all if we could come to terms with the title of this article – ‘ No one rule fits all ’

As a lady you can’t expect to have the exact kind of relationship your friend has when you both are not dating same guy. You can’t treat your man the way your sister treats her own man just because it works for them. What works for you may not work for me. Likewise what works for you may not work for someone else.

Most of the articles you see online are all suggestive. Positive suggestive if I may add. They are just few pointers you should use in weighing the dos and donts in your love life. You don’t necessarily have to follow them word for word. That an article tells you your man would shout your name out loud with a mic or have your pics daily on his dp to show you are the only one in his life or the only serious woman in his life doesn’t mean the guy you are dating isn’t serious with you. He just might not want every other person all up in his business. He probably like a certain kind of lifestyle.

As a man, you dig up an article online and it tells you you should always have your own time with your friends. You don’t need your girlfriend hanging around you often, then because of that you cut off all dating plans you have with your bae. Suddenly the relationship turns boring, she complains and then you say she is seeking attention or overly nagging and expect her to know that things are still going on strong with you and her. My brother, use your brain. The person chunking out these article might be on the next flight to paris on a holiday trip with his bae, and you are there single handedly ruining your relationship.

I remember reading through comments on linda Ikeji’s blog on some posts about Toke Makinwa, and I saw so many bittered comments. Quite a number of people were claiming many women left their man all on account of viewing toke’s vlog and wasn’t ready to work things out with their man, while Toke dated a man for 8 years or even more before finally tying the knot and I was wow’d.

This article is a call on all youths out there going through emotional hazards and surfing the net on regular basis for information on how to deal with it all to apply wisdom with sense. Take time out to study your partner and your relationship. Think decisions through before making them.

And most importantly, treat your partner the exact way you would want to be treated. No two ways about it. Be understanding and considerate.

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21 comments

  1. This is very nice. I remember a post I read about what women do that makes men think they are cheap, and the writer was saying don’t give your boyfriend money or buy gifts for him. Let him be the one doing it all d time, then you as a lady can do it once in a while. That you are the lady and should be pampered and praised and i was like WTF, what is wrong with spoiling ur own man often if u have the money. Its things like this that some girls will see and they will be all about taking and taking and taking without giving. Just like u said, we should learn to apply wisdom with sense. What worked for okeke may not work for okafor. Love the new look by the way. Its very easy for me to access now. Kudos!

    1. Lol. Personally, I like the Okeke/Okafor meme.I love this article. It’s somewhat similar to the message I preach. Different strokes for different folks.Beyond relationships, if every man can go beyond the knowledge of this and actually practice this, understanding would be promoted and peace, to a large degree, would exist in all of life’s spheres.Great piece.

  2. My first comment on the revamped page……Hahahaha @the Toke people. They are pants!!! Truly, we need to limit the things we read. I read a lot of relationship stuffs and most times I am shocked by the nonsense that some people write. The last paragraph is the standard, I swear. I love the new look, btw.

  3. I do catch myself reading relationship quotes and article then taking them to my bf like, why you don’t do those things? or see what this says. Neither I nor a few words can turn a boy into a man that’s something his mother should have done. I realized we dont have a understanding and I’m very one sided at times and I can admit I need to work on myself to fully commit to the relationship.

  4. Yeah that’s the golden rule of any relationship. Treat others (including your Bf/gf,spouse etc) the same way you would like to be treated by them.

  5. Well most writers may talk or write authoritatively as much as they like, but no writer can force you to act or otherwise on their writings authoritatively. That’s a choice every reader has to make

  6. What works for you may not work for me. Likewise what works for you may not work for someone else.We all see life differently so is our approach to life.Let’s be considerate in all we do.

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