How I discovered this CATFISH

catfishHere I am, sitting all alone and thanking God for all he has done

This quest to find a boyfriend won’t put me in trouble. I have been single for close to two years now and its really getting boring. Most people were beginning to say things about how it could be spiritual and all, so I decided to do everything possible to get a boyfriend at least.

I embarked on this journey by being super friendly online and even offline. After a short period I decided to restrict the super friendly mode to my online male followers (emphasis on twitter). I jumped on every guys’ tweet. I retweeted, replied, quote retweeted to get attention but nothing still happened – no man, boy or nigga entered my DM (direct message (inbox)).

After about two months I started believing the spiritual problem thing. I got so worried and prayed more and more on this issue of having a boyfriend. Every other part of my life was almost on standstill and I got irritated at everything. My prayer points changed, my outlook changed, I started losing myself and even stayed away from twitter.

Not until one evening, I got an alert indicating I have a mention from twitter. I wondered who it could be because I had no friend on twitter neither was I in any caucus. So I was very sure no one would notice my absence. I reluctantly clicked on the twitter icon on my screen expecting it to be a mention from one of these bloggers or a spam DM.

Behold! It was a real message, from a guy. I am sure you can imagine the kind of joy I felt. My face brightened up. It read “hey babe! Been a while I saw your tweet. You good?”. Boy! I zoomed his avi (avatar) noticed that he had a very cute face and beards!!! I felt lucky!. I had this instant believe that God has finally answered my prayers. We got talking and he said he would like to meet me in person. I still kept on forming hard to get but couldn’t hold that up more than a week. Remember it took like forever to get a fish in my net, so aint gonna joke around this one. Meanwhile, he told me some things about him.

He said he was a graduate and that he works with MTN. He lives alone. He also said he had a bad relationship and have been single for a year except for few flings and the likes. He told me how he picked interest in my tweet. How I would interact with everyone regardless of gender or size of follower. He told me he admired me a lot and have been crushing for a while now. He also said that bearing my absence on twitter for that short while was just him trying to hold back his emotions. He said the sweetest things and made me very happy. He never asked for my nude which I expected from the kind of gist you get to hear from guys you meet online. I was looking forward to seeing Tolani. Then finally we fixed a date for a Saturday to see a movie at Ozone and get to talk better after the movie.

I tried to look as beautiful and as simple as possible. I finally got to see this cutie of mine. He wore a dark blue jean, a red T-shirt and flip-flops. We hugged, exchanged pleasantries and moved into the cinema hall. I got there a bit late. I enjoyed his choice of movie, who wouldn’t? It was “We are the Millers”. I laughed all through the movie. After the movie, we went to the 2nd floor of the building and settled in at Chicken Republic. He asked what I wanted and went to get it for me. Perfect gentleman right? We talked, laughed, held hands and all.

It was soon time for us to leave. I expected this guy to walk towards the car park to get his car or something but we stood at the entrance still holding my hands. He then asked, “How are you going babe?

His question brought me back from my thoughts and I replied “I will just get a cab, thanks to Fashola, no byke for me. I so miss bikes” .

A Pretty princess shouldn’t be hopping bikes dear, thanks to Fashola”, he said as he planted a kiss on my chin.

I blushed. I stopped a cab and was doing the negotiation while I noticed him go for his wallet. I was supper happy. Meeting a handsome gentleman isn’t easy these days. Just as the cab was about moving, he handed my cab fare to me, saying I should pay the cab guy myself to avoid funny attitudes. I smiled and we said our goodbyes.

As the cab moved, a strange thought came to mind and I told the cab man to pull over in front. I told him to wait so I could watch my new found boo leave. Just then I saw a guy step towards him from the building, they did the men shake and I noticed he hailed him somehow. My curiosity increased, as I watched them head back into the building. I quickly gave the cab man the money he gave me and followed them up. It was easier for me because they didn’t use the lift. They kept chatting, laughing and took left. I followed carefully and got a bit confident when I realized they were engrossed in the gist and laughter that they wouldn’t look back.

I followed my new found boo back up to chicken republic and watched him go into the concession stand. I stood with some guys hanging around with a forceful smile and there and then, I saw my MTN working class boo step out again but now changed to his service wear. He’s actually an attendant at chicken republic.

I was so surprised and felt the tears roll down my eyes. I didn’t say a word and was glad he didn’t see me. I kept wondering why he would tell such lie about him. What other thing was a lie and the plenty gist and laughter with his friend(I suppose) was over my foolishness I guess? I was so confused and hurt that I remembered my ordeal in my last relationship. I blocked him, deleted his number and never picked any of his calls till he stopped calling. I don’t know what his conclusion would be about me but I careless. He should have been sincere. The last thing is need in my life is a catfish

Well, it’s in the past though, Here I am, sitting all alone and thanking God for all the way long.

Thought to share the story with you all, I am happy in my relationship now and might tell you all how I met him….. That’s if he (my boyfriend) agrees to that. I remain anonymous.

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25 comments

  1. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL……Whoa!!! For real????????? chai! these bro’s ain’t loyal fa. eyah. Good thing you were smart enough to find out. most girls would be content with the cab fare and not care. Your desperation also didn’t get the best of you (Y)

    1. yea, good for her. Curiosity didnt kill the cat the time around. thanks for dropping a comment

  2. So cuz he lied about his job she wickedly deleted the guy and broke his heart…. What if that was his whole month’s salary that he used to give her such a treat… She is wicked…. She too like money… She is not reasonable… She should’ve understood that he had to form for her at first meeting so she could atleast hear him out, no girl will wan2 hangout with a service attendant at a restaurant

    1. Bro amechi, biko take a seat. A guy that told those magnitude of lies and you’re still having pity on him. Abeg Wetin make am no fit just tell the girl he’s just an attendant ehn? Guys need to build confidence in themselves. I’m not trying to blow my trumpet or anything but I’ve never lied to a woman about what I do for a living even if I notice she’s way above me. I’m old enough to handle my affairs and cut her to size if she lets her status get in her head or try to belittle me cos of that. He fucked up big time and he’s the type that give guys bad names and reputations. He can rot behind her delete button for all I care. Dear ladies, do not get worked up cos of relationships or the lack thereof. Things work for good in perfect time. Had she been indifferent about the guy’s attitude that day, she would have lost her pussy to some silly boy and more. Great intuition jare.

  3. Azzzz in eh@ Amaechi? Shugar dont you think your reaction was a bit harsh? I thought he was going back into the mall to catch another fish,but indeed he was going back to his hustle.I bet that dude is way better than a lotta guys are, he’s got prospects right there cos nothing about him suggested he may have lied. He sold it perfectly, gave her a good time and even paid 4 a cab,all on a waiter’s salary. I’d also bet he’s indeed a graduate, who ‘s quite literate enough to pull off such a scam. His only crime was the lie and deception. One question though, would she have accepted him if he told her the truth 4rm the beginning?Remember, she fell completely without even meeting him,all on speculations inferred from his twitter Avi.Catfishing really ain’t cool but folks do it when being real and truthful becomes wasteful and unrewarding…

    1. it doesnt change the fact that he is a liar and an imposter. not forgetting a catfish. thanks for commenting though

  4. honesty pays somehow. though the babe should have asked him why he lied, and probably let him know she wouldnt date him cos of that. cutting off without telling him what he did is a bit immature

  5. He did it well…looolz! Naija girl would force you to do anything..I no sure say our mothers do like this . First meeting was Ozone, why not under a guava tree? Nice story, keep it up.

  6. U should tell him his wrong before u break him off becos he mighty not know u are smarter than him.

  7. They are many guys who are not rich but in love with a gal who thinks she got class…many of such gals swore never to have anytin to do with a guy thats has no money forgeting dat every man has hope and a bright future. This babes are more concern about the present situation. Sum are from rich family background already but still dy don’t wanna date a guy dat dnt have, sum gals are nt frm a rich background..so, dere tink dating a rich guy would also make dem rich. Instead of wrking hard 4 money, dere will say “monkey na my darling if him get money” wat happens to the guys who dnt have but need to be loved?, what happens to that guy whose heart yerns for you but works in a restaurant?. Am not gonna blaim that guy cos he lied because that was the only way he could get her attention….many guys do that just to be with the gal of their dream even for one day. Money is everything cos we all need it, its not everything cos it cannot buy life. Its vanity…. so, fine babes..date a guy that loves you even if he has money or not, it doesn’t realy matter where he works. That guy may be down today but tomorrow he is up,only God knws the end of everything. PEACE!

    1. yea, yea, yea. the babes realizes all you have just said. But the fact still remains that the guy is a catfish. A liar! very wrong

  8. That Amechi guy and his cronies should take a seat here on this couch \_________/. A guy told lies of such magnitude and would have broken the lady’s heart eventually cos one lie breeds more and all you guys saw fit to say was that blocking and deleting him was harsh. For all I care, he can rot behind the block button. What’s his excuse? There’s no Mobil $ Mr Biggs renovations from Osun, Oyo and Lagos wey I no follow them do the casting and rebuilding and I had OND and BSC as at then. Should I then have met a girl then and lie to her that I’m the site manager and feed her lies? Hell NO!! Even when I was doing my professional exams and wasn’t working and didn’t have a dime to my name, I dated a creamy babe that was way above my station and when she started misbehaving, I cut am to size and told her to fuck off. Now I’m married with two kids and by God’s grace, managing myself and she’s still fucking single and searching. I’ve always been of the school of thought that a man who is down need fear no fall. Don’t eat grass just cos you’re at the bottom of the food chain at the moment. Fowl wet no die go still chop corn na and even our women know that. My dear, I’m glad your curiosity got the better of you jare. You needed a man but God sent you a boy first so you’ll know the value of a man when you find him. Shalom.

  9. At least he’s doing something honest and decent but not an arm rubber or a yahoo 419 boys,Did anybody care to ask d girl where she was also working,that’s always d problem wit u ladies looking for a well prepare meat to eat,all she could have done right is to appraoch d guys another day and let him know that she actually knows d true about his job and encourage him as a young man if she really want to settle down wit a man period.

  10. @amechi, u sure dey no b u diz story dey Yan abot? Well… He lied and would have lied more if she didn’t find out but the truth is she would have demanded an explanation not cutting off totally that way, if I was the lady I would have gone back to republic anytime when I’m sure he’s at work and pretend to go buy something from him (maybe), then the whole story may start there…..but no every one is this patient so don’t lie at all sef, its better I skip the part of u that is not-so-good for another day and that day should be when you’re sure she likes u a bit!

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