On the 16th of November 2016, my door was forced open by armed robbers who immediately striped us of all our devices and valuables. Myself and a friend.
With a gun to our head, we were commanded to strip. We did.
Yes, we were raped at gun point.
All our pleas fell on deaf ears as they had their way, and left.
Few minutes later, mobile policemen and neighbours began to converge in their neighbourly pattern, in twos and threes, with folded arms, solemn looks, bowed heads and pitiful eyes; with much “sorry”, “take heart” to give and curses intended to follow the rapists/armed robbers.
Soon they left in their trickles.
Fast forward to the next morning, neighbours and sympathisers Converged yet again., and started dishing out various kinds of words of encouragement and advices on what to do, ranging from taking my pants prayer altars so as to lay curses on the culprits, to burying the panties, there by burying their destinies, others said, to do this and do that. And of course, go to the hospital for check up against pregnancy, HIV and infection.
I listened intently, but a part of me desperately wanted to hear them make mention of the emotional and psychological remedies that a rape victim should undergo. But they were most concerned about the shame associated with the rape and with the properties stolen.
I knew better but I wanted to find out if our society is changing and becoming abreast with the changing times, But I was disappointed.
The most disturbing part of the range of advices coming my way was the part I have heard frequently, which is the part of not talking about it and not letting more third parties hear about it. Within me, I boiled angrily as the shocking truth of our insensitivity and gruesome backward-ness still held our sense of reasoning. Still we attach so much importance to the vagina thus we make rape and abuse victims shrink in fear and self loathing just because they were raped.
We still make it a time of shame for a victims who in their innocence was forced against their will and consent, while the rapists glory in their act just because we choose to say nothing. Just because we choose to cajole victims to be quiet and hide Because in our words, she or he has been raped or sexually abused thus shame should be her cloak and clothes. Meanwhile shame ought to belong to the rapists and abusers.
My name is Maureen Alikor, I have been both a victim of sexual abuse and most recently rape. One of which was by a relative and the latter an armed robber.
On this premise of this and knowing the importance of speaking , I am launching a campaign called DEMYSTIFY ABUSE.
It is a neighbourhood, school to school and house to house campaign aimed at helping abuse and rape victims go through the experience knowing that their worth and esteem is not tied to their vagina. And also help rescue those who may have fallen into the pit of self pity and self loathing, hating themselves and not seeing anything good and meaningful thing come out of their lives.
The campaign is aimed demystifying abuse of every calibre of which rape and every rape related activity is family to.
PURPOSE OF THE CAMPAIGN
* I hope to use this campaign as a means to remind victims that though they were victims of abuse or rape, that their lives have not been damaged. And help them through the healing process.
* I hope to bring it to the awareness of victims that forgiveness is the first step to healing.
* I hope to point these victims towards receiving appropriate health treatment, bringing it to their knowledge that being silent about the incidence is dangerous, as they may have been exposed to sexually transmitted diseases.
And also pointing them towards the proper tests and counselling that should be taken so they can continue leading and living their lives as normal.
* Also, I hope to teach younger boys that the female body is not a sex object. And also teach boys that their esteem and worth does not come from how many women they have had sex with.
* The campaign is aimed at breaking the “silent code” associated to sexual abuse and rape. Awareness is the chief of education, if people are aware, of the risk factors of rape, it will curb the high rate of rape cases that is been recorded.
* Awareness of body parts and its functions is a vital information that should be at the tip of the fingers of both boys and girls.
* The importance of self discovery is another factor that needs to drummed into the minds of both boys and girls.
Our society focuses on the not so important aspects of life and living, thereby leaving our young ones at the mercy of peers who like them are ignorant and at the mercy of mass and social media where sex sells freely and cheaply.
-Every young boy and girl, who may have gone through the traumatic experience. And those who haven’t.
-Any older person who may have had the experience and who needs helps healing.
YOUR HELP IS NEEDED (Voluntary Service)
Join our team of:
*Social Media Team
To join us in any of these areas
Send your full name and location to 08156614213
Or to firstname.lastname@example.org
As the campaign is about to hit the schools, and as it progresses, we have the need and hunger to invest mentally, intellectually, emotionally in the lives of young people, who as we call them are our future, and there is no better way to achieve this but by investing in their reading culture.
We believe books are vital and important and have a role to play in moulding and remoulding of minds.
We intend to give gift of books to every young mind we can, to do this, your help is needed.
We hope to build a Demystifying Knowledge Library (DKL)
If you have books you are willing to donate to this campaign,
call or send us a message on 08156614213
Or send us a mail at email@example.com
Join our Facebook group : DemystifyAbuse
Instagram page : demystifyabuse
P.s. Abuse is abuse and should not be encouraged in any way, which includes but not limited to the silent code associated with it.