Believe it or not a sort of Feminiphobia is taking root in society similar to Islamophobia. While most people are not afraid of individual Muslims and even have a hand full of Muslim friends any public criticism of Islam remains a very sensitive topic especially when approached from the point of ridicule. The same is becoming true of feminism and dare I say it, this is a huge step backwards for a movement that kicked off rooted in a just cause. Like most movements of an ideological nature feminism is without a doubt rooted in a just cause and I will be the first to admit that the liberation and education of women is paramount for social and economic progression in any given civilization. But like most movements and acts of revolution the original point is often lost in time as can be seen in most religious institutions where the internalizing of religious and moral philosophies are often replaced with a dogmatic conformation to letters of law or an outright misinterpretation of intended ideas.
From my understanding of feminism, the idea was to liberate women from the patriarchy social construct by re-educating both men and women on what it was to be female and why existentially this affords women just as much freedom and liberty as men. Most men you speak to these days will agree to this without any arguments even if we do not brand ourselves feminists. However, it seems these days feminism has moved past its roots in emancipation of women into the field of point blank victim playing which actually undermines the very concept it was founded on.
I have met several self-proclaimed feminists (which is becoming more of a social fashion statement lately) with no real idea of what feminism is or even who Simone de Beauvoir was. Just the other day I watched the video from this link. The title of the article reads ‘If you know someone who doesn’t believe sexism exists, show them this.‘ Ladies, the reason men are sick of hearing this cry for sexism is not because we do not sympathize with the social situation at hand, it’s because we do not appreciate being stereotyped with a very small minority (which is sexist by definition by the way). Rape and other forms of sexual abuse is not a ‘male‘ or ‘sexist’ problem. It is a social problem of which men and women are equally concerned. You think men don’t think of male rapist as repulsive or disgusting? We even think of female rapists to be less disgusting. Or you think we don’t view men that have been abusive to women as weak and foul? A woman can slap a man across the face in public and people passing by would ignore this. Try slapping a woman in public and see what reaction you get from other men. But somehow violence against women in a feminist issue.Men will accept any form of systematic oppression of women as sexism and by God would we fight for freedom on that front, but cloaking general social problems as feminist issues will trigger a defense mechanism in most men as it sounds like we are all being labelled for the acts of a very small minority. We will also not stand for accusations like objectifying women when women constantly objectify themselves even if they claim to be ignorant to this fact. There is also the issue of telling men how we think. We watch porn, but I think the vast majority of us can separate the fantasy of pornography from real life as women can separate the fantasy of erotica novels from real life.
I will end this post here to avoid slipping into essay mode. In summary, while the causes fought under the feminist umbrella can hold merit sometimes, it would be in the feminist community’s best interest to label these issues a social issue that affect both men and women to avoid creating a sense of exclusion which men will not respond to positively.
If you watch porn then you have a very big problemYou may think that you can watch porn and respect women, you lie. You can’t.
Did you know that lots of women also watch porn? Some even make their boyfriends/husband watch it with them. Or you think it is exclusively a male industry? Also we know 50 Shades of Grey didn’t become the best selling book of the year because men were reading it…and lets not go into the erotica market that is almost single handedly supported by women around the world. The only difference is that men are more visual and haven’t got time to use imagination while flipping through over 500 pages. Your opinion is clearly subjective even if you try to pass it on us like it is subjective. And why is it only women that claim to be objectified in porn like men aren’t there too…and let’s not forget that men get paid less in the porn industry but never mind pay equality in that kind of business. Women and men have their fantasies met by different industries. The reason why men watch porn is because it represent the typical male fantasy of sex without attachment. The reason women read erotica is because it represents the female fantasy of sex with commitment. It is really simple psychology. Something hasn’t got to be wrong with you mentally to watch porn or read erotica. In fact it is natural considering the current social construct we live under.
Wanted to reply Tessa but you’ve already said everything i would have said. From the income, to the psychology behind it. Women will sit and watch Magic Mike with glee but it’s men who have a porn problem? And yes, Magic Mike is classified as mommy porn, same with 50 shades. Same double standards William was talking about.Porn can mess you up though, but then, almost everything these days can have that effect.
Me I don’t even take feminists seriously. lol
No let Chimamanda Adiche see you!