The House IX

I managed to keep Boka mute till we got to my room. I wasn’t sure about how much he had heard or knew sef. Because with the way things were going, he could very well have concluded with the girls to play the prank on Bode. Hmmm, it would be good to let him jump the gun first. We got to my room and I let him in while I stood by the door. Weird way to hold a ‘top secret’ conversation I know but then again you can always know who is coming and when to switch conversation. Besides who would think you having a serious talk with an open door?
Come o, Sesan when you turn James bond wey you go dey stand for Aso rock window?“..He shot first as I expected.
Ehn? You know see say I dey piss ni“..
You dey piss na im you stand for about five minutes dey hear wetin those girls dey gist about. Chei Sesan, you no go die better o, you don wan scam one of them“..
Boka, you see say you no get sense, why be say na so so scam full your head? You think say na everybody be like you?“..
Shatap!!! I know say you no fit fuck them so the only thing wey you wan do na scam na“ was the time to find out how much he really knew sef.
Wait, wetin you think say I hear wey I wan use scam them?“…I asked.
I no even hear them, na you wey stand like statue of liberty I dey look. I dey hear people voice  but e no too clear.“.
Seems I was safe because there was no way on earth he could say he didn’t recognize Yemisi’s voice. He obviously didn’t hear anything.
So wetin dem dey talk“ was his turn to be curious.
Nothing jare, na Mimi and Lepa matter them dey talk..say them go fuck one man last Friday, wake up steal the man phone and money run comot“…that was the first lie that came to my tongue. All prostitutes have stolen na at one point or the other.
Chineke!!! You serious? These girls don dey turn something else oo“…his mouth was still wide open after finishing this sentence..
Ha, na so me sef see am
Like how much dem move from the man“..Boka for you, always after the money.
I no even get idea but e b like say e much small“…
Sesan,come o..shey you no think say we suppose collect our own share for the money?
Now it was time to leave the stupid boy and go find a more proper person to arrange a plan.
Boka,you don dey mad small small, e never much o but the madness don dey come. You wan go extort olosho? The day wey police go come raid them, na you dem go mention as their pimp“..I said that as I stepped fully into the room to pick up a pack of biscuit I still had left on the TV. Time to go look for Bello….
Boka, I dey comot jare. You know where Bello dey?
I see am be like one hour ago,he say he dey go Konigba go drink Jedi.“…he replied without looking at me. I could tell he was wishing he was the one that had stolen some money right now. That’s his own business, I stepped out. Heading out to konigba which was our local hangout spot on days we couldn’t afford to go to normal bars or clubs. Besides I needed some Jedi sef, my back ache was getting unbearable at nights.
One thousand naira for a fuck. Kept ringing in my head all day. This had to be one of the best jackpots in the history of man! But wait o, the girl is a prostitute. I stood still in the middle of the compound and digested that bit of reality but then again what were condoms invented for sef?! I hissed and started walking towards the room. I still had about three thousand five naira. I could manage to live on one thousand naira till monday when I could go to the bank. I would go and see the girl later in the evening before they go out for their work. And that evening sef, everybody would be preoccupied betting in Sesan’s room. So one thousand for this evening then tomorrow morning, another fast thousand again. I would still have five hundred change sef. Correct!
I would ask for good blowjob before we fuck sef. I am betting she would be way better than Latifah, she’s a prostitute..she’s supposed to be better. And any blowjob that can be better that Latifah’s hmmm is going to be out of this universe. And that her ass ehn,maybe we can fuck doggy first then later do hands on the wall. Yes! No! We should try hands on the wall first then touch your toes second and maybe she would ride me last. Hmmm or she should ride me first?
My boy, how far?“..I didn’t notice I had gotten to the room and there was Boka sitting on the bed…
I have told you, stop calling me your boy. Where is Sesan?” ..I shot back at him.
I be like map wey I go dey know where your cousin dey?” He hissed and he stood up and started stepping out. Good riddance! I was beginning to really hate the guy. I dusted off my slippers and fell face flat on the bed. Now which position was I going to start fucking that girl with first oo?


Nna menn, so these girls wan chop that money alone. I must collect my own for there oo, when no be only dem dey live this house. Na all of us!!! Chei, who I fit go meet now do backup? And na only God know where Benji waka go? Na Bello for sweet for this kain parole but that one no dey too talk with those ashewos and he go dey form one yeye chairman. Chei! Who again oo?! Uti! Wowu! I don even forget say that one dey dis planet sef. I sharply adjust my leg go him room..make he sha no cut me comot for the deal. As I dey reach him room, I stretch neck peep, thank God say him door dey open..that useless Stella fit dey inside. That girl too like preek, I wonder why she never come fuck me sef. Make I knock o, make I no go chop slap, as I put hand wan knock na im I hear,
Who be that?!“..see voice, e b like Bazooka.
Uti’lo, na me oo chairman“..
Ehen wetin you dey find here?
I come see you for one important matter ni“..
E involve money?!“..shey na me abi him voice dey resemble Army commander own?
Errrm yes o” …I clear my throat well
Enter, off ur slippers O! Make I no go slap you“..
The lord is my sherperd as I enter him room…

Written by BASS @OlumiCFC

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