Friendship is a relationship of mutual affection between people.
There are people who can easily go on with names of people they call friend. Using the word friend means nothing to them or is it possible to have mutual affection with countless number of people? As possible as it may sound to you, there are people like me who are weary of using the word ‘friends‘. For us, being friends with someone means a lot more and requires some level of connection.
I believe the word most people should use in place of friendship should be ‘acquaintance’, which means a person one knows slightly, but who is not a close friend, regardless of how bad people feel when a person they consider a friend sees them as an acquaintance.
However, it is time you understand that a person you call friend may not call you friend. Do not take it personal. It simply means you both have different standards for choosing a friend which is totally normal. Its just like the romantic relationship between a man and a woman, the man I will want to date might be the same man you would never think of having anything with. Just as we have unrequited love, there can be unrequited friendship. Its a matter of choice and preference and maturity requires that we understand.
If you then have a friend who considers you a friend and you have both agreed there is a friendship, then how healthy is this friendship of yours? What sort of friendship model are you into? Is it sustainable? Friendship model is simply a design for a successful friendship. I also do not mean you have to sit with your friends to draw this model out just as a business partners sit to draw their business model. Naaaa…. Friendship comes natural. Albeit not always romantic, it is love.
According to Robert Rowney, D.O., a certified psychiatrist and the director of the Cleveland Clinic mood disorder unit, there are certain habits that genuine friends possess, which make them more like family. – huffingtonpost
As much as being a good friend is not always easy, there are genuine friends and you can be one of them. A genuine friend or a genuine friendship will have the following characters. If these genuine characters are present in your friendship, perhaps, you have a sustainable friendship model already.
1. Friends are Honest
True friends will be honest with you no matter. They call us out when we are wrong. They will not blow your trumpet while you drown. They’re able to point out some of the negative things you’re doing in addition to the positive. They really support you on both sides.
2. Understanding and Forgiveness
Friends understand your weakness as much as they see your strength. They make excuses for your weakness even when you are not available to explain. They look out for you and forgive your unintentional wrong doings. A real friend will reach out to you when you hurt them, rather than making gossip out of your misunderstanding or bearing a grudge. They apologise when they make mistakes.
3. They Push
Friends make us better people. They push us to be the best version of ourselves. They stick with you and grow with you.
They are dependable. If I cannot depend on you, then why are you my friend? I know we cannot always depend on a friend for everything. But having that friend you can depend on in certain situations is everything. Also knowing what not to bother your friend with is being dependable.
5. Friend do not use friends
Good friendships don’t arise from hoping someone else’s popularity or networks will rub off on you.
If this is what your friendship is about then there is no friendship. You cannot be friends with a person because you want to be accepted in a certain clique or feel a certain way. That is not friendship and believe me when i say they will see through you someday.
6. Be Loyal
Do not discuss your friends behind his or her back. Friends are loyal. They keep your secret to themselves.
They say familiarity breeds contempt but not with a true friend. A true friend values you, respects you and never looks down on you.
A true friend is unconditional. They do not do things for you because they expect you to repay them. They do it because they need to and they can.
9. Accepts you for who you are
A true friend can be friends with anybody regardless of their choices in life
True friends celebrate your win and support your losses. They cheer you up all the way
Got more characteristic I missed out? Please share them using the comment box.