HUSBAND Material

This one is on request and might be opinionated. If you don’t agree, you always have the comment box to air your views, but for the next five seconds or so give me some space to rant away my feelings on the subject that has been thrust upon me.

The newest student in my class had me proof read his latest write up “Wife Material ”. I must confess, as I read it, I had to blurt out “we have our own list too”. As one of the commenter’s pointed out, we most certainly have a list and Oknuges, don’t you worry we also do our own fair share of discussions on what we look out for as ‘husband material’. Here are a few of them.

To all the beautiful and hardworking ladies on my BBM (Blackberry Messenger), who won’t settle for anything less than the specifications on their list a big shout out to you. To all the ladies who decide to compromise just because they feel life is passing them by, oh well all the best and if there is any other group I missed out, ‘sorry’ will have to do. I am not a robot, so you don’t expect me to remember everything.

Before I go on with the list, I just want to set the record straight. Contrary to the popular opinion of the male species we aren’t looking for a guy with a fat account to drain just for the fun of it. Mind you I am not saying we would mind if he has twice the cash, I am just saying that it isn’t top priority. Of course we would like him to be financially stable, but take note of the word “POTENTIAL”. He must have potential and we will be willing to grow with him.

These are the things we look out for:

  •  He must be godly, God-fearing. Seriously, if you cannot lift me up spiritually, then I think it is better you just leave me in my father’s house, after all who wants an anti-climax after marriage? It is supposed to lift you innit? This goes first on the list of any female individual.
  • Don’t be domineering. We recognized and accept the fact that our Creator made you the head of the home. We are willing to respect and even acknowledge that, but you need not remind us every five seconds. Afterall the Lion is the king of the jungle and he doesn’t remind the lizards about it every blessed minute.
  • He must be respectful. I believe the common saying is “respect begets respects” if you demand it from us, I believe we would be better followers if we see you being an example. Don’t you know that when respect is showered on any individual, it gives the feeling that you are appreciated despite your short comings?
  • It has been said that a confident man is a successful man. Confidence in most cases gets you the girl. The opposite of confidence is a big turn off.
  • He must be responsible. That is the big elephant in the room. I am entrusting my life into your hands, you are taking over from where my family left off. So if that trait is lacking you can be certain that I won’t budge no matter your other credentials are. Actually this comes second.
  • He must be sensitive and patient. It is known that a lady has seasons. Sometimes we nag (it is in ourDNA), sometimes we are rude, naughty and get angry unnecessarily. It is not an excuse, but your ability to overlook it and treat us like you would treat your younger sister will endear you to us. In our silliness, be patient with us. If and when you do this, we will be willing to give an arm for you.

He must be TRUSTWORTHY, understanding, supportive, caring, intelligent, hardworking, and kindhearted. Please don’t stop me, because I intend to keep on going. Okay, my time is up, but it still doesn’t change the fact that we want it all. And yes we want him to be knowledgeable in other matters which I chose not to mention here. But since we do not live in a perfect world, we might settle for close to 90 percent. (You aren’t allowed to judge, afterall, that’s an A.)

The point is we are looking for someone who we can be ourselves with. We want a friend.

I agree that loneliness can be horrific, but let’s face it guys, you cannot do without us!!!

Written by Tope Olofin (@toperants)

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12 comments

  1. We are definitely looking for guys we can be ourselves with. Ladies need to stop settling for less. Nice one Elsie!

  2. Right @Damstyle, I could as well say the same thing just like half the guys who would see this. I just hope we’re perfect judges of ourselves, a good miror will be helpful at this point.However clear this list is,finding the right fit is still dependent on your ability to be compactible with such a guy. He would also have his own list,so what matters is for both parties to find a common ground and meet in the middle. Know who and what you are first,once that’s settled, you can perfectly stick to whatever and whoever your list gives a distinction.

  3. Hmmmmm….dis page sef knows dat wen I start I fit comment pass blog na y e no show me comment box on tym!!!!!Neva settle 4 less my sisters but wait r u lookin 4 Jesus Christ????? All dis qualities in 1 man! Den I’m sur u wil even b scared to date him cos u wil say ” he is too good to b true” na we na we kno hw we do it!!!!settle 4 ur match nt for less nd nt for Jesus’ twin broda……if dey can’t trust demslves,hw wil we trust dem 100%? If he has excess moni u think u r d onli 1 dere? If he has 6packs abi na parkwell sef nd a rili cute look nd is 6ft 10″ nd fresh nd posh wil u nt say he is a winsh? Or u think u r d onli babe dat has gud eyes? Babes let’s cut dis awa material accordin to d yards we need! Yes he must be respectful nd God fearing yea sur nd truth be told he must b a CHEERFUL GIVER biko u don’t hav to work in an iol company or b d manager of a bank to giv, I used to kno students dat spent more dan workers sef. we all love d cheerful givers YES!!!! We alll hav awa prospectives fantasies nd mine has to b prince charming 😀 1 of d several tho!!!! Finally let’s jst check awa own material quality b4 we luk 4 cord lace to wear wit china white……lmao!!!!!!! Cheers

  4. @Dhoney.LMAO!!.@Elsie, nice write up.. You have said it all.LÓL.. Also,the guy must be.GODFEARING AND SUPPORTIVE all the way…

  5. Hmmmmmm …. Fascinating list @Elsie *rubbing palms to write ma own list*Elsie don’t u dare run *in Pete Edochie’s voice … Spiritman Speaks …

  6. The competition for one man with all these traits will be tougher than the American Green Card Lottery. And then ladies, please, ask yourself as honestly as you can, do you really have what it takes to meet the needs of this man? Some babes will say they want intellectual man and they can’t even hold an intellectual conversation. And don’t even get me started on the ‘I love God’ babes on IG…The way I see it, you are what you attract. So no need for the list of requirements. Just be the counterpart of the kind of man/woman you want and the rest will take care of itself. But the bitter irony is that no one is ever good enough for anyone because in some way, we are all really fucked up and life throws so many curve balls that makes the angel today the devil tomorrow. Just close your eyes and jump in, best marriage advice ever lol

  7. Women need men who are good listeners too. Some men think Becos they are d head, they can’t listen to their wives.

  8. your list of expectstions sre quite simple as they are the normal expectations from any decent man. however to whom more is given more also is expected, one with these qualities deserve an equally balanced woman.

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