Happy Valentines Day to you. I woke up this morning feeling I should share something on reassurance in a relationship with you and then i stumbled on this post I wrote and shared In the year 2014. Its still valid and make a whole lot of sense. As you celebrate with your loved ones today please do remember your relationship is not only about Valentine.
(REIGNITE THE FLAME)
Everyone looks forward to Valentine’s Day. I won’t bore you with the Valentine story because the truth is ‘it bores me too’ *yawns.
As far as am concerned, it’s all about love. Showing love and appreciation to your partner, colleagues, friends, family and neighbors in the little (big) way you can. We all agree right?
Another fact is that most of us have consciously or unconsciously narrowed it down to just being for couples. Whether married, dating, courting, boyfriend-girlfriend, sex mate, FWB or whatever you call your kind of love (pardon me for not having an idea). So I will dwell on this aspect for now.
Valentine’s Day signifies love and most couples use this day as a day for rekindling emotional flames…-a day of reassurance. Yes reassurance? If it isn’t then why go through the stress of buying a gift or arranging a surprise package on Valentine’s Day? You already know he is your man right and she knows she’s your woman. So what the heck? You can as well get her gifts on the 13th of March or April just as you can every other day. But he or she just wants to be sure she’s that special one you can go to the moon and back for, especially on a special day (birthdays not left out)
Has anyone ever told you that a lady would want to be reassured of her man’s love every single day? That’s one thing they don’t get tired of. Trust me on this one. If you have to tell her every day that you don’t care about those other ladies that looks more classy, beautiful and gorgeous than she is then you just have to. Your partner might get tired of hearing you say ‘you look beautiful/handsome today’ but they can never get tired of hearing you say ‘baby, no one can ever take your place in my life’. Because the truth is, someone somewhere will always be more beautiful, handsome, classy, brainy, gorgeous, prettier than your partner.
Now my problem with this day is the anxiousness that envelops the female folks on days like this. They wonder what their valentine’s day would be like. And they silently ask:
“How many gifts would I get?What kind of gift is it going to be?I hope it would be expensive enough for me to show it off to my friends? …….”And for some, they think of the perfect gift for their man and pray he likes this particular one gotten after 6months of saving.
Ok! PAUSE!!! Think back… when was the last time you told your wife/girlfriend/partner you love her? And dear ladies, when was the last time you told your husband/boyfriend/partner you love him?
Yes I know most ladies/girls/women will be exonerated but I can’t say same for most wives. (a topic for another day)
Now, think of it this way, if your relationship is actually worth the stress then that anxiety shouldn’t exist. The show off syndrome should be cured by now and you won’t be bothered about the price of that gift but the amount of love behind the gift.
Your partner should show you love daily, irrespective of the day or time of the year. You should be showered with surprises of gifts, little gestures, romantic ideas and get away vacations from time to time according to your day to day schedules.If it has to take the Valentine buzz for him/her to know how to appreciate you, then you had better start wondering if you are really appreciated or a picture in his/her gallery.Little things makes the heart grow fonder. If you are the kind of man or woman that waits for days like this to tell your man/woman how much s/he means to you, then I put it to you that you have been torturing your partner for the past 364 days.
You love her/him? Yes. Show it and most importantly, ACT it.Going back from work with a tiny box of chocolate or a cup of vanilla ice cream or even a lovely rose would make your woman the happiest one on planet earth and erase all the stress of the day (stress of taking care of the kids, house chores and going on with her personal business at the same time), it works like magic.You think women are complicated? That’s because you neglect the little things that makes them happy.You think your man isn’t romantic, not caring or is cheating on you? That’s because you have thrown away those things you do that turns him all on and decided to be just you. Why? You have been together for 1yr, 2, 3, 5, 10? So???
Sometimes there is a big problem in being just you. In relationships, you have to always try to rekindle the love. Make that heart beat faster for you. Be wild, be loving, be adventurous, be caring, be sensitive, be you. Do not let that fire go off. That fire of love.If your love life with your partner has been very practical and fun then a day like this is just another day to be enveloped with love, passion and gifts. But If you only appreciate your partner on Valentine’s Day then a day like this is unnecessary.
And for those without a spouse on a day like this. I know that feeling, it can be very horrible. Especially when it’s time for the show of gifts. Some girls secretly send themselves a gift just to feel among. I’m not saying it’s wrong to spoil yourself but please don’t be intimidated into doing so. Why not be happy? Smile. Go out with some friends. Laugh. Write (you don’t know how good your writing can be when it’s from the heart), put how you feel and what you wish for on paper. Don’t be enclosed in your world of pity. There are a thousand single guys and girls out there just like you. And some will join the queue on days like this (yea right, it happens a lot). Today might be your lucky day.