It has always been a subject of debate as to if one could have a crush on an object of one’s imagination. Yes an inanimate or rather imaginary thing. I did not believe the phenomenon could exist until I experienced it. It also happened to a very close friend of mine Ireti. Ireti happened to be a womanizer all through our days in secondary school and university. He dated girls of all sizes and shapes, complexion and tribe. I could easily say Ireti had no taste. Ireti went in and out of relationships with different ladies as easily as you can think of and it seemed as though he wasn’t going to change. Not until ‘The Day of The Dream’ as we later termed it.
According to Ireti, a 5feet 10inches tall, dark, and handsome computer engineer, he had a dream about a girl that doesn’t exist in the real world of men. And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, — everybody does — until he told us that he has a crush on her. “A what?” we all asked in unison.
“A crush” Ireti repeated.
“Like a C-R-U-S-H?” Simon asked “normal crush?”
“Yeah,” Ireti said with a mischievous grin on his face “and I’m really enjoying it.”
“Ireti is playing one of his pranks on us guys, and I’m surprised that you guys are giving it attention. Common guys who saw the match this evening what was the final score?”
“We saw the match,” Ireti began “I mean she and I saw it. We saw the match together in my dream.”
“I would have said you’re joking, but with this expression on your face you know what I’d say? You are going crazy.” Ayo a very reserved member of our group said bluntly.
“Ayo we sat in the front row next to you. On your left to be precise, I can recall you offered to buy a girl a drink and she told you to your face that she’s bi-sexual if you wouldn’t mind.”
“And how could you possibly know that Ireti?” Ayo asked a little bit shaken. “The stools on my left were empty through the match.”
“Maybe they weren’t empty after all.” Ireti replied.
I was both amused and confused as this drama unfolded before us. Could Ayo have been so engrossed in the match or rather embarrassed by the girl — you can say guy — that he didn’t notice Ireti sitting next to him with a new catch? There has to be an explanation to all these craziness, I thought.
“Guys I’m for real men. I met this girl in my dream and i…have a crush on her …i am in love with her”
That was the point where we felt really concerned about him. There had been cases of people freaking out and going nuts while preparing for their final exams. However, none of the cases were similar to this.
“Let me narrate how it happened,” Ireti pleaded and we were more than ready to allow him explain. We needed an explanation. We deserved an explanation.”
“I went to see my supervisor this afternoon. When I got there, he practically cancelled all the work I’ve been doing for the past three weeks. He said my literature review was shallow and lacked form. I was devastated when he told me to begin again. In fact, he suggested I should choose another topic if this one is too cumbersome for me.”
‘Eeyah guy sorry oh…I have the same problem brother. My supervisor told me to rewrite my conclusions and find reasonable recommendations to replace my according to him ‘infeasible recommendations.’” Fabian the ‘I know all geek’ in our group said.
“Guy shut up. Focus please.” Ayo snapped at him. They were always at loggerheads. “And you’re not in the same shoes. You’re writing chapter five he’s writing chapter two. Why are you this condescending? Obviously you’re trying to spite him.” Ayinde and I laughed at the two of them and urged Ireti to go on with his ‘fable’.
“I decided to go back to the hostel to take a nap before going to see the match. I guess I was too tired to stand up when it was time for the match, so I continued sleeping. That was when it began. I was walking towards the Amphitheatre in my dream when I met this damsel. She was dark skinned, of average height, eyes that I could die for. A complete figure eight, the way I like them. My first instinct was to go after her but something restrained me from doing that. So I went to the basement to get some snacks and catch a glimpse of the match. When I got there, I saw Ayo seated and I decided to sit next to him. I can’t explain why we didn’t greet or talk. After some minutes, she joined me at the cafeteria in the basement, and for heaven’s sake she sat beside me. It was not long after then that the lady who Ayo asked to buy a drink for walked in. she was in a black jet pant, and a blue top with a black face cap that was tilted aside. She had red Nike sneakers on too.”
“My God, how could you possibly know this? You must have been close to the cafeteria or something. This didn’t happen in any dream.” Ayo exclaimed as he stood up. Surprise was written all over his face.
“No.” Ayinde said plainly “I need to clear something here. Do you mean what he just said is true?”
“To detail” Ayo confirmed.
“Jesus. We got to the hostel together this afternoon. He slept, but I didn’t. I was working on my project. Ireti did not go out until now.”
“What exactly is happening” I asked.
“I don’t know either,” Ireti said ‘the reason why I am not as scared as you guys are right now, — I should be more scared — is because I enjoyed the experience.”
“You need a pastor Ireti, this is clearly spiritual.” Fabian cut in.
“Spiritual my foot,” Ayo snapped “Ireti please continue.”
“In the dream, I took a walk to the pool side at the sport centre. I leaned on the railing and watched the athletes train. I was there for some time and just when I was about to leave I heard someone greet me. I looked sideways and it was her. I said hello and began to walk away from the pool towards the cricket pavilion. She followed so I decided to start a conversation. We talked till it was dark and I walked her back to her room in Moremi Hall.” He paused to see the expression on our faces. It was a mixture of surprise, fear and concern. He continued, “One thing about this lady is that she’s everything I ever wanted. Everything I ever dreamed of in a lady. My child hood fantasies, you name it. She’s even studying law. Can you beat that?” and so Ireti finished his tale and left us to our thoughts. No one spoke of that day and its mysterious events until later when some really strange things started happening.
We all graduated that year with good grades and we were mobilised for the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) program. Ireti, Ayinde and I were posted to the east. Ireti and I were posted to Cross river state and Ayinde to Enugu. Fabian and Ayo were posted to the north, Fabian to Kaduna and Ayo to Sokoto. The first three weeks on camp were the most interesting for me; I enjoyed every bit of every activity. I enjoyed meeting new people, some who became friends and others who remained acquaintances. It was during that period that I noticed a change in my friend Ireti.
He was more reserved, yet happier. He had this air of satisfaction around him like he had everything in the world that he needed. He talked less to people, made less friends and the most surprising of all, Ireti stopped womanizing. I was of the opinion that my friend will be one of the guys that will rock the NYSC camp for those three weeks. That he would attend parties, date as many girls as possible and what have you? The reverse was the case. I was surprised. I later found out that Ireti sacked all his girlfriends before we left school.
We left camp in Calabar and were posted to different places to serve. I was posted to a school in a remote local government while he remained in the capital of the state, Calabar where he worked as an analyst in an IT firm. I envied him. My friend was getting everything he desired despite the fact that he never went to church. He wasn’t as spiritual as I was. I was baffled, because I used to believe that in order to get anything you want, you had to fast and pray earnestly. So I decided to visit him in Calabar one weekend. I had only one mission in mind which was to ask him what really was causing all these changes. I was determined to know and apply the same principle to my life.
Ireti lived in a two bedroom flat in Calabar. According to him the flat was the Boy’s Quarters of the main house where his boss lived. I remember we used to argue about adapting to living conditions in school and Ireti would insist that he can never live below certain standards. I remember bringing up the issue of NYSC accommodation during one of those discussions and Ireti telling us that he will live in a two bedroom apartment during his NYSC program. Of course we thought he was just bluffing or as Christians call it ‘confessing by faith’. I believed him when I saw him in his apartment that weekend and of course, I became more baffled.
The impression we all had was that Ireti knew someone at the company who pulled the strings together and got him an employment there. He proved me wrong. He knew no one at the office. The company needed a NYSC intern who studied computer and would be trained for later employment, so they requested from the NYSC and Ireti of all people was sent. The branch manager of the company happened to like him and offered him an accommodation in his Boy’s Quarters since it was empty for the mean time. Ireti jumped at the offer. I envied him because most of us — coppers — spend a large part of our allowance on accommodation, and here’s someone who lives in a larger apartment for free. If I didn’t know his parents I would have said his father is probably a native doctor. There were actually many things I knew about my friend yet I still felt like there was more I didn’t know compared to that which I knew. I knew Ireti was a thinker. He could brood on anything and think it through. He also had a very wild imagination. He could imagine anything and this was evident in his writings, both prose and poetry. We usually made jest if him that he made a mistake in choosing computer. He should have been in the arts we thought, but art was just a second interest for him. My friend was a great thinker and had a wild and active imagination.
The living room was large, larger than my one bedroom self-contained apartment. He had it decorated to taste. It was obvious he was earning a good sum. Ireti was living large.
“Ireti I’m beginning to suspect you. Are you part of some cult or something?”
“Ohhh guy haba now?” he managed to say amidst a fit of laughter. “I don’t even know anyone who is a cultist” he added laughing even more.
“I’m serious here Ireti. How come all the things you always said you wanted are coming to you?”
“That reminds me” Ireti cut in “you remember that car I talked about in school?”
“Yes the Mercedes M class. Well you don’t have that yet”
“I’m getting it this year. And guess what? I’m not going to get the one I showed you in school. I’m getting this year’s edition.” He said so confidently with a broad grin on his face.
“You had better come down to earth and stop fantasizing. Where would you possibly get the money to buy that?” I argued, not because I doubted he would get it but because I wanted to know from where and how he would get it.
“Guy everything I ever fantasized about is coming to pass. So tell me why I won’t go ahead and fantasize about more. Besides it’s not necessary I buy it.”
“So you are going to steal?” I pushed knowingly.
“Of course not,” he exclaimed ‘what do you take me for? Guy abeg no go dey tag me. I nor be thief. I’m just following my instincts. Can’t you see? I don’t know what’s happening either. I just know it is happening and I’ve been observant enough to notice the trend.” He rattled on taking it serious this time. “Everything I desire, everything I really want in my life, I brood on it so much that I begin to hallucinate about them. When it gets to that point they manifest in real life. That’s just it. That’s what is happening and I can’t explain it myself.”
“You mean you just imagine it and it happens?” I was more confused now, than I was when I arrived at his place.
“It’s really more than that but it starts from imagination. When I imagine— I’m not sure if everyone is the same —it becomes part of me like it’s really happening to me and I begin to feel good about it. I remember some time ago in 100 level, I didn’t have money at all. I had squandered my pocket money for the semester on those girls. I just started imagining that I had money, not deliberately though. I started thinking of doing the things I’d do normally if I had money. And I felt good about it. It was so intense for about three days. I began to carry myself around like I had that sum of money. In my head I had it, in my subconscious I had that money but I didn’t have it in hand It came that Friday five days after I began my imagination. The exact amount of money came into my hands. That was when I began to take note of these strange things.”
To be continued…..
Written by an Egeria Press Author, Adekunle Adeayo.
Image source: theaposition