People say “since sex has become easy to get, love became so hard to find.” I sincerely believe that is somewhat true because having to discern LOVE from LUST is as good as Doctorate.Most first experiences don’t turn out good, because we already have an expectation of outcome of sex; thanks to movies, porn, magazines, internet and people’s attitude towards sex. Then that craving sets in.You say to yourself “it’s just the first; the next should be pleasurable, thereby anticipating a next. And then we start enjoying it. (Hell yea it’s a wonderful experience) then you always want more, you feel ‘I need me some vitamin S’…. then you start understanding what it means to be satisfied.Very few reach this satisfaction with their first partner, for some, they get there After 2 to 3 partners and then you tend to know the sizes of a man’s penis and positions that suites you….. THEN!!!… Satisfaction in bed is added to the so called “Mr. Right’s list”. There and then the problem begins. Even if he takes you on different dates, shows you off, buys you gifts, plenty pleasant surprises, basically treats you the way you want your Man to treat you, you think of; ‘he isn’t good in bed….I can’t spend the rest of my life with a man that can’t satisfy my sexual desire….. Let me enjoy his goodness for a while and move on when there is a better person… I am so gonna cheat.’ And it destroys it all.
But as the saying goes; ‘The smaller the Penis, the more reasonable the man is.’ I don’t know how true that is… So I am here wondering; what if we were virgins and just have a man prove their love in treating you the right way and understanding each other’s character to be sure you compatible then you both head to the altar? Don’t you think there would be less heartbreak and disappointments, less immorality if we could stick to saying NO to PRE MARITAL SEX. More like back to the days of our parents. After all you just would have only your husband’s PENIS for the rest of your life.
So I ask us these questions:
What’s your take on virginity? Do you think being sexually chaste before marriage will help save us from heartache and marriage last longer like our parents believed it will or it doesn’t matter at all? Does a girl’s virginity make you as a guy appreciate a lady more? What do you think?Below are what some of us had to say: Obinna @MrCrux_M It’s Twisted, i don’t like virgins. At this point in my life yhh…, it’s a wife i am looking for and a woman that has seen stuffs, tasted the dick and chose mine as her favorite. Not one that will taste mine and want to taste another, you dig? I believe the cure to heartache is understanding. Virgin oooo, not virgin ooo, don’t matter. Girl fit spoil after marriage, so its not a determinant. So virginity wont give assurance for a long lasting/happy marriage. I respect a virgin any day any time, its not easy being chaste so you got to give them kudos but the truth is that deep inside, there is always this craving for sexual fun. I respect and appreciate them but i am cared of spending the rest of my life with them Dazall.Tessy @immune70I can still recall when i was a virgin. I had my mind set to give it to the man i will eventually marry but sadly it didn’t turn out that way. Do i regret it? Yes, everyday. Forget what male folks makes us to believe that they don’t wanna get with a girl if she is a virgin. That’s just something they tell us to fool us into giving it to them. I gave it away but did the guy love me at the end? Did he get married to me? NO. And my next boyfriend, I was faithful but making love everyday didn’t make him stay. That’s why relationships don’t last. Lot of girls give it freely. Look at the days of our forefathers, they married when they were virgins and we didn’t hear of divorce or separation between them. But today the rate of divorce is so high. Since ladies are giving it freely, it makes a man cheat on his wife. But if we stay virgins till we get married then there will be less cases of adultery and broken homes.
Well for me it’s not anything close to what leads to long lasting marriage or anything a good woman. Whether virgin or not, I prefer a good woman with good character to a virgin. For me it has no criteria towards being a good house wife or does it change anything if you marry a virgin or not.
I think virginity is overrated. I believe if a guy really loves you, he won’t care if you are a virgin. The real fact is that some women who their husband met as virgin and yet they still treat them badly and still have as many girlfriends as possible outside. I think it doesn’t matter. Runs girls (aka ashewos) are even the ones that get the best husbands at the end of the day.
Sincerely i would say that being a virgin before getting married isn’t a good idea, though we have been made to believe that this is a good thing yet its down aspects can lead to cheating. Sex is gratifying and when a lady starts having it she seeks more and as a novice in it, heading into marriage, there is a tendency she might want to explore outside her matrimonial home. Having sex before marriage isn’t bad but having too much of it isn’t good. Now what is defined as too much? Well this depends on the certain individual and as such the quest for more is where it all goes down high when not being satisfied. The truth is we are different as humans and our thought process are different likewise. To some people there is nothing like too much. In conclusion, LADIES if you want to explore, do so but don’t go too far na… na somebody go marry you oooo…lolz and use a condom. Stay Safe.
From the biblical way, being a virgin before marriage is right because it helps you appreciate yourself and your spouse (if he is the right one). On a second thought, being a virgin doesn’t make you a saint you know, because you would want to test other men after marriage which can lead to cheating. So from my point of view, I don’t really think being a virgin is cool. Because you need to know who you are getting married to before you jump into it. What if the dude has a small dick??? TESTING IS ALLOWED.
Being chaste before marriage is a good thing, very commendable I must add. The reason I am totally against sex before marriage is this… If I sleep with every guy I have dated, how many do I have to sleep with before it gets to my husband’s turn? I am in my early twenties & of course I have dated lots a guys, yes lots X_x. Yeah I know, I am not a whore & NO, I don’t sleep with them. I just get bored too easily & being that I am young, I haven’t quite ‘found’ myself yet, so I don’t know what I want in a man. I don’t even know what my criteria are for choosing a man, yet. Hope that is not a bad thing :]y Money or success doesn’t move me, cos I am not greedy & I am doing quite well for myself, thank God for that. I just look out for that connection, real friendship. Enough of the blabs about myself, back to the question…..I feel sex is to be cherished, with that one special person in whom you have found your friend, partner, confidant & all (I am a hopeless romantic sha #:-s ) & the feeling of being one’s only or first partner is really something *dreamy sigh* & NO! It doesn’t guarantee anything, it sooo doesn’t. It might strengthen the bond between the parties concerned but no, no guarantees….non at all. There are no guarantees in the game of love sef 3-| & life in general. Anyway, to conclude, sex is for married people but hey I am not judging, it’s not the day you both decide to go to the altar or have a ceremony that is the true wedding day, it’s the day you both decided that, yes, we are going to be together forever. After you have both committed to each other, there doesn’t have to be witnesses. Do you guys get? Plus, my principles are mine to live-by, not to impose on other people.
It’s good to be a virgin till marriage but it is not a prerequisite for being a good person or a good wife. Because she’s not a virgin does not make her less worthy and vice versa. To me, people attach too much significance to it. It’s the heart and attitude that matters, coupled with understanding.
It doesn’t matter at all. U see ehn? Virginity is overrated in Nigeria. I thought God created the vagina to be disvirgined. There’s one thing I know, in recent times, if one is a virgin, everyone looks at them like someone who shouldn’t even exist or something, because some marriages have collapsed in recent times just because one of the partner is not sexually active. In most cases, it’s the woman that is usually the victim. Now looking at the question…. SEX SEX SEX …. Sex is just the ultimate thing in a relationship and without being disvirgined, there is just no way a man will continue going out with you till you both eventually get married.Having said all that, the whole chaste thing doesn’t really work out in Nigeria, like people are even scared to roll with virgins and stuffs. Being chaste doesn’t even help secure a relationship let alone marriage.
My personal opinion, being a virgin before marriage or after marriage doesn’t really count. I personally wouldn’t want to marry a virgin….the wahala of ‘disvirgining’..lol… + its messy. I feel trust is the keyword…if you marry someone who isn’t a virgin, and she’s trustworthy and understands you, both of you would be fine. I don’t really appreciate virgins. I appreciate a faithful girl who loves me whole heartedly and who is proud to flaunt me to the world.
Ok, here is what I know: being sexually chaste before marriage will not save your marriage or even save you from heart break. Everything that has to do with relationships, marriages and all are personal decision. Yes, we appreciate virgins a lot…like very very well, but it is not something I believe to make marriage last long or keep your heart safe. This is why I said ‘Personal decision’. Personally I have disvirgined two girls. Here is what happened: I loved one so much and the other was just meant to be ‘take away’. I didn’t believe she was a virgin before the act. After the act, she was actually telling the truth. Now, it didn’t make me love her and it wasn’t because I was in love with someone else. Although I respect her a lot and that’s all she can get.So being sexually chaste is for your own personal good as a lady. Maybe you don’t want to sleep around and all, but if you finally meet a guy, whom you think is Mr. Right and then marry him for whatever reasons. You being a virgin won’t stop him from having extra marital affairs. That’s why i said its all about “personal decision”. Here is what can save you… NOTHING but TRUE LOVE.
For me, virginity is an act of sexual discipline until after marriage. Strictly for couples. And for the second question, it differs, you can’t compare the life of our parents to now. And I think being chaste before marriage helps because it last longer and make me appreciate my woman.
And I would say: if you are a virgin, KEEP IT. You are precious. Don’t let anyone make you feel less. Don’t feel burdened to lose it because your friends say you are not a big girl yet, you are naive or missing out. If you have to, be convinced in your heart that you should. A whole lot comes with losing your virginity, especially to Mr. Left and without proper knowledge of what you getting into. Have a mind of your own. STAY BEAUTIFUL! What do you say? ———————–Got something you feel like sharing?? Send your articles toElsieisy@gmail.com .. Anonymous or not..you decide, just make sure you are passing a message(POSITIVE).