Yesterday was international women’s day and I promise this has nothing to do with the theme of this year’s celebration, neither does it have much to do with gender equality…maybe not. You know how I enjoy putting down my thoughts and opinions as they come to me? I am trying to do just that this morning. It’s hard doing a lot of that these days especially when we are now in an era where everything said or written has to be weighed against sensitivity, inclusion and generalization. It can be very tiring and limiting in terms of expressing as much as we should, unlearning, relearning and learning. But we mueve!
Have you noticed how audacious some men can be in the midst of their many fvckups? It’s like they enter into their phase of demonism with a sprinkle of audacity. Personally, it is extremely difficult for me to just stroll back into a person’s life via whatsapp or a phone call when I know I have messed up. And to do it without starting with an apology? My God! Its mind blowing. I have had conversations with my friends, acquaintances and colleagues and it’s same for everybody. That man who left you hanging without explanations, the man who emotionally aroused you with no intention of commitment, the man who ghosted you for months without reason, the one who really just wanted sex but came with relationship vibes…they can all wake up one morning and send you – ‘Hey!’. And I am always like – “The Audacity!!!” Really, How dare you? What level of high are you operating on? Why do you think you are so special that you can always be absolved of your atrocities? Frankly, I want to know because they seem to always get absolved of their atrocities and given room to prove themselves.
In trying to figure out their high, I tried to speak to my friends that are male and from what they said, it boil down to how it seems like as women, We want to be perfect. The need to be the right one, perfect for whatever and accepted as perfect makes us overthink everything. We read meanings to every word (spoken and unspoken) & actions. And because women are almost always ready to give them the benefit of doubt, they know that 98 out of 100 times, the door won’t be slammed at them. Beyond that, they also have this very healthy self-esteem massaged by the society and orientation that they are needed and are the trophy. So at the end of the day, they just don’t dwell on their wrong doings, they do what they want to do per time because they know we have made plenty room to accommodate them and they see themselves as some form of premium spec, regardless. It has nothing to do with their account balance and what they can offer…they can just come as naked as they can with dick in hand to be served on the table.
So here is me thinking – if women will ever succeed massively in this dating game, then we must learn to stop overthinking things. Just do as it comes to mind. Begin to see yourself as premium spec, regardless. Allow yourself to make mistakes and learn from them. But don’t punish yourself by being your own judge. Forgive yourself and move on. As long as you have not committed murder, you deserve to appear with just pussy in hand to be served on the table as well.
Do we get my point?
Honestly, man hating is not an option ( at least not for me). I want companionship and i will get it one way or the other. Women have got to learn to imbibe the kind of audacity men have in the midst of demonism they display. Just gerit!
Maybe just choose to challenge your Timidity… And yes i remember the first line of this post, some sort of promise? Dang!