Hello!
I have gotten emails from my darling Elsians saying they have missed my writing and opinion on Relationship and Lifestyle matters and I am deeply sorry. Not that I have not been doing anything or being lazy. The thing is, I have a radio program where we discuss those issues instead of writing them and I put in so much energy into creating new content – Topics, discussions around it and also tracking my guests and making sure they are comfortable expressing themselves freely on the very blunt program – Crux of the Matter.
But hey, I have a solution for my unforgiveable lapses on this blog. The things I do are linked, very linked. So moving forward, I will try to create articles around my opinion relating to the discussion we’ve had on radio and also come up with fresh tips and opinion for the blog. So can we kiss and make up already? LOL
Thank you all so much
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Body count is basically the number of people you have had sexual intercourse with in your sexual career life. It’s something I have dealt with on one of my podcasts (Click here to listen). Discussions around Body Count gets reactions and emotions running wild with some (guys majorly), claiming it is right to ask a partner of his or her body count while some (Majorly Ladies), claims there is no point asking body count.
From the above information, there is only one thing to deduce – Great number of women are not owning their sexuality yet. Forget about Feminism, forget about gender equality, forget about being liberal, etc. Most women would rather withhold their body count information, not because they would not want to tell, but because you and I know what follows after that.
So until we get to the level of being sexually equal and owning our sexuality as women, here are 5 Reasons Why You Should Never Ask Your Partner About Their Body Count
Your past is supposed to be over!
Take that religiously or not, it doesn’t erase the fact that in a relationship, a real relationship, your partner’s sexual past does not matter except that sexual past begins to hinder the present and the future. At that point, the doctor steps in to do the asking. Are you a Doctor? If yes then not to your partner biko.
Assumption and doubt
If you date a woman like me, I will not lie to you about my body count but I definitely will not honour you with a response *in Omawumi’s voice*. Now tell me, how will that make you feel? You begin to think I do not trust you enough – doubt, or you start assumption? Doubt and assumption are two dangerous ingredient not to be seen in your soup of love.
You will never really believe it
Let’s face it. There is this saying which I have confirmed, that people go by over and over again and even on my radio program – when a lady tells you her body count, multiply it by 3 and when a guy tells you, divide it by 3. This is out of the idea that a lady will always lie about her body count and a man will always inflate the number. And I beg to ask, who body count don epp? Why ask if you will not believe whatever answer you get? What’s the point of going to harvest when there is clearly nothing to harvest? Think about it
You are not all that liberal please!
A caller on my show last Friday said something about a woman understanding her man and knowing if he is liberal enough. I tried to make him understand that sex is a different ball game for men as they like to own but he maintained that if a woman does not know how liberal her man is, then there is a problem. I had to let it slide because we were live on air. However, now that I am on my playground, I can yarn…LOL
No matter how liberal a man or woman claim to be, you cannot be liberal in all matters of life. There will definitely be something you cannot imagine being liberal about and those things can be very personal. We are all humans and we cannot be totally perfect. Its important to note that relationships are made up of two imperfect human beings coming together to create a perfect union. So, NO! most people are not liberal when it comes to sexual matters. You may be, I may be, but millions of people out there are not. It is however, advised that you thread with wisdom and caution, thereby, considering the consequences of your words and actions because you will always bear them alone.
So no, be you liberal or not, do not ask, there is a deep part of you that you don’t know and I bet hearing the figure – 50, will awaken that part. Thank me later
You genuinely care about your partner
If you genuinely care about your partner, then all I have mentioned above should stop you from asking such questions. I mean, all that should matter is the person you are with now and not the person he or she was in the past, you should leave no room for doubt or put your partner in a position where he or she needs to lie to save face because you will not believe it and no, you are not liberal, don’t tell me that. Rather, focus on making your partner very happy and being the best he or she will ever have.
Try be the last figure…or not!
Image source – huffingtonpost.com
10 comments
I don’t understand why some people think this body count is absolutely necessary. Like when you finally get that information,how does it help you and your relationship biko!!
God bless you Elsie! God bless you! You couldn’t have said it better!I’ll like to be on crux of the matter in the nearest future
knowing about a partners body count wont undo what has been done. Just keep mute about it and have peace of mind as well as a lovely night rest
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Really enjoyed this post — such a great reminder that love and trust matter so much more than someone’s past. When we stop judging and start focusing on the present, relationships become so much more genuine and peaceful.
It also got me thinking about how self-confidence plays such a big role in intimacy. When we feel good — emotionally and physically — it’s easier to connect deeply with our partner. I recently read The Phoenix ED Device Reviews (2025): Deep Dive into At-Home Acoustic Wave Therapy
, and it highlights how physical wellness and confidence can strengthen relationships from another angle.
Thanks for writing something so real and relatable — this was a great read.
— Hanif Jewel
This was such a refreshing read — it’s rare to see someone talk about intimacy and trust so honestly without judgment. I completely agree that focusing on your partner’s past only breeds insecurity, while true connection comes from communication and mutual respect.
Your point about emotional maturity really stood out. When couples focus on building confidence and deeper intimacy in the present, everything else naturally improves — physically and emotionally. I recently came across The Phoenix ED Device Reviews (2025): Deep Dive into At-Home Acoustic Wave Therapy
, and it echoed a similar message about how self-care and physical wellness can strengthen confidence and intimacy in relationships.
Beautifully written piece — thank you for reminding us that love is about growth, not numbers.
— Hanif Jewel
Wow, this was such a refreshing read! I really love how honest and relatable your writing is — it feels like you’re sitting right across the table, just talking truth. The point about not letting the past define a present relationship hit home. It’s rare to find someone who can discuss sensitive topics like this with both humor and empathy.
I’ve been doing some deep dives lately into topics around personal growth and confidence, and stumbled upon The Phoenix ED Device Reviews (2025): Deep Dive into At-Home Acoustic Wave Therapy — interesting how both conversations, though totally different, circle back to self-awareness and taking charge of one’s life.
Keep doing what you do — your voice matters and your perspective is always worth the read.
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Thanks for sharing your thoughts!
If you’d like to explore more insights into self-improvement and wellness, you can check out my latest piece:
👉 The Phoenix ED Device Reviews (2025): Deep Dive into At-Home Acoustic Wave Therapy
What a refreshing post — I absolutely agree that massage therapy is one of the simplest and most natural ways to turn a stressful day into a better one! The way you explained how it boosts dopamine and releases “feel-good” energy really connects. I’ve always found that even a short massage can ease headaches, calm anxiety, and bring back mental clarity.
It also reminded me of how modern wellness supplements now support nerve health in similar natural ways. I recently read Nerve Renew Reviews (2025): Does Nerve Renew Really Work?
— a deep dive into how certain vitamins and ingredients can help improve nerve function and reduce discomfort. Like massage, it focuses on healing from within instead of masking the pain.
Both show that taking care of our bodies naturally — through relaxation and nutrition — can truly lead to healthier, happier days. 🌿
What a thoughtful post — I really loved how you described the healing power of massage! It’s true, a good massage doesn’t just relax muscles; it refreshes the mind, boosts circulation, and releases those “feel-good” endorphins that instantly lift our mood. I couldn’t agree more that it’s one of the most natural ways to turn a tough day into a better one.
I also checked out the Life Line Screening Reviews (2025) article (link here
) — it beautifully connects with your message about health and prevention. While massage therapy restores balance and eases tension, preventive screenings protect us from unseen health issues before they become serious. Together, they remind us that caring for ourselves is both a healing and protective act. 🌿