By Stela Xega

Today I drank 6 cups of coffeesmoked 11 cigaretteswrote 5 poemsand all togetherspoke 4 words

I don’t know what happiness is

but I’m pretty sure this isn’t

anything close

I know you don’t want

my companyor my words,

neither do I

Being with someone

who’s everyday in pain

might get you bored, I know it well

so

I give you spacelike satellitessing melancholy humswhile they orbit,

like our shadowsfollow us in the daytimeand give us distancewhen the dark sets in,

I just hopesomeone is putting theirwhole body around yoursand telling youyour laugh sounds likecrunching leaves and

someone is writing all yourfavorite songs down tomake a mixtape to listen to whenthey miss you

you and I are justsuitcases full of thingsthat haunt us,

our baggage is actuallyextremely light, it’s theghosts of people wethink we areobligated to be thatweigh us down,

gravity is not workingagainst us, it neverhas been, we canlet go of these anchors,

let our hands createa bridge to somethingbetter, not cling sotightly to thehandles ofthe past.

we laughand agreeto the thingsthat happenedto usthat we madethem happenneither of usreally knowswhat it meansto fall in love,

the only answerever really isit’s complicated,

but drinking coffee,laughing, we bothfall in somethingfor a momentand then outand we laughmore andit’s okay.

Image source – www.bridgetinspires.com